Premature ejaculation has been defined as persistent or recurrent ejaculation with minimal sexual stimulation before, during, or after intromission and before the patient wishes it. There have been a number of psychological approaches to treatment, though we could not find any papers that defined the effectiveness of these approaches.
It's one of the commonest of all sexual problems. Recently, we did a survey of several thousand British males, and approximately 10 per cent of them said that they 'often' or 'sometimes' had this trouble. We found that it's commoner in younger men - which is not surprising, as there's a distinct tendency for it to improve with age. Men generally get better control as they grow older. However, a 2004 survey in Europe showed that middle-aged men still have this problem. Fortunately, good treatments are available.
Premature ejaculation is usually an unmistakable experience to a man or his partner, but through the years it has been difficult for professionals to agree on a precise definition of this common sexual concern. As Helen Kaplan, M.D. and other professionals point out, this phenomenon may occur because the man is unable to recognize that he is about to ejaculate. And even when he does recognize he is approaching ejaculation, he feels he is unable to control or delay the process. (read more on stopping premature ejaculation)
More on stopping premature ejaculation
Several factors may contribute to premature ejaculation. Psychological problems such as stress, depression and other factors that affect mental and emotional health can aggravate this condition. However, there is growing evidence that biological factors can make some men more prone to experience premature ejaculation.
Although premature ejaculation is one of the most common male sexual disorders, it remains widely under-diagnosed and under-treated. Most physicians do not screen for premature ejaculation and patients are extremely reluctant to talk about the condition with their partners or health care professionals. premature ejaculation can have a significant impact on many aspects of a man's life. It can affect his and his partner's sexual satisfaction and their ability to build and maintain relationships - both sexual and non-sexual - and can impact a man's general sense of self-confidence.
Most cases of premature ejaculation do not have a clear cause. With sexual experience and age, men often learn to delay orgasm. Premature ejaculation may occur with a new partner, only in certain sexual situations, or if it has been a long time since the last ejaculation. Psychological factors such as anxiety, guilt, or depression can cause premature ejaculation. Since alcohol can delay orgasm, stopping the regular use of alcohol before sex may also play a role in this problem. In some cases, premature ejaculation may be related to an underlying medical cause such as hormonal problems, injury, or a side effect of certain medications.
"The penis can be trained without the hassle of starting and stopping or pressing your fingers anywhere," says sex therapist and former sex surrogate Anita Banker-Riskin, coauthor (with her husband, Michael Riskin) of Simultaneous Orgasm & Other Joys of Sexual Intimacy (Hunter House, 1997). "But first you must make the effort to develop your pubococcygeus (PC) muscle, which you’re now sitting on. The PC muscle involuntarily contracts as you ejaculate, causing semen to fly. But if you purposely contract it during the peak of sex, the PC muscle, says Banker-Riskin, acts like the brakes on a car and can bring an ejaculation to a halt. "Like any other muscle, you need to exercise the PC," says Banker-Riskin.
stopping premature ejaculation
Your health professional may recommend that you and your partner practice specific techniques to help delay ejaculation. These techniques may involve identifying and controlling the sensations that lead up to ejaculation and communicating to slow or stop stimulation. Other options include using a condom to reduce sensation to the penis or trying a different position (such as lying on your back) during intercourse. Counseling or behavioral therapy may help reduce anxiety related to premature ejaculation.
The knowledge of normal male and female sexual responses prior to engaging in sexual activity may be helpful in preventing premature ejaculation.
However, the primary treatment of ejaculatory control is helping a man, by various techniques, to repeatedly focus his attention on the increasing erotic sensations in his body as he approaches orgasm. By increasing his awareness of the buildup of these pleasurable sensations he is better able to judge where he is along the path of reaching an orgasm and ejaculating. (Note: orgasm and ejaculation are separate events, caused by separate systems in the male's body, though they usually occur at the same time. The term orgasm is commonly used when speaking of a male's ejaculation. Technically, however, orgasm is just the peak of the intense pleasurable feeling that usually follows a man being highly sexually excited. Squeeze Methods: this method involves either the man or his partner squeezing (fairly firmly) the end or the tip of the penis for 10 to 20 seconds when ejaculation is imminent, withholding stimulation for about 30 seconds, then continuing stimulation. This can be repeated until ejaculation is desired. The stop and start method can be used with the squeeze method as well. (read more on stopping premature ejaculation)
stopping premature ejaculation - Tips
Once you have good control during masturbation, and appreciate whole-body sensuality, and feel comfortable breathing deeply during lovemaking, then you're ready for the couples program -- if you're in a couple. The couple approach is called the "Stop-Start Technique." First, arrange "stop" and "start" signals with your lover, for example, a light pinch or tap, or a tug on an ear.
Appreciate whole-body sensuality. Men often think sex happens only in the penis and only during intercourse. That view is a one-way ticket to uncontrolled ejaculation (not to mention erection problems, and women with those proverbial headaches). The best sex involves head-to-toe arousal. Men learning how to approach -- but not arrive at -- their point of no return, need to appreciate whole-body sensuality, the pleasure potential in every square inch of the body. Whole-body sensuality releases tension. Tense bodies that have no other outlet often find release through involuntary ejaculation. But as you learn to appreciate sensual pleasure from head to toe, whole-body arousal takes the pressure off your penis, and you last longer.
Don't use drugs or alcohol. They're distracting and they interfere with the self-awareness crucial to learning ejaculatory control.
